Adder, Horse, and Wren Indeed

Well this morning brought a surprise. Through inspiration and vision I found myself to have come across Epona, Goddess of Horses, the great Mother of Gaul, protector of animal companions. Our meeting was sudden (at least to me) and brief but She has been well on my mind all day since. Her hooves beat gently in the back of my mind, the very thought of Her sending those telltale shivers through my body.

It breathes new context into last night’s omens. A change, a bolt from the sky, and Horse of course.

It is beyond thrilling to know a new friend has crossed my path. I hope I can make Her visit worthwhile.

A Return To The Altar, A Return To A Dialogue, A Return To The Dedicant Path

It has been too long.

I found myself drawn to my altar, now smaller in size than it once was, calling to The Kindreds initially out of personal obligation, a desire to return to a regular routine. Unsurprisingly this little sit with the dishes, stones, sticks and lights snowballed into a dialogue. I find myself once again embarking on the Dedicant Path. My calling echoing once again, the sound of it pounding against excuses and the strangeness that is Life As It Happens.

So I felt a need to draw omens. The Oracle hummed at me. I took the deck and held it against my breast. It had grown cold where it sat. I wanted it to be warm again. I turned it and shuffled it and rubbed it and smelled it until I knew there were words to be said and turned cards.

For some funny reason in my head I ended up drawing for Ancestors, then Shining Ones, then Nature Spirits. But that’s what happened. The Honored Dead brought to me the Adder. The Gods brought to me Wren, reversed. The spirits of Earth brought me Horse, reversed.

The message was pretty clear. I was experiencing a transformation. My journey was not going smoothly. My wit and my bond to the Gods was lacking, being wasted.

The first omen is pleasant to hear, I suppose. I have a difficult relationship with change. Perhaps how I see myself changing is experiencing a change. I would happily molt away that old skin. The second omen is something that, on the surface level, I want to say “Yeah, no shit.” but the creatures of the land see and hear far more than I could ever hope. I suppose it would behoove me to keep my ears open extra wide for the foreseeable future, lest I tumble into a ravine.

The Wren however… I mean, I get it. I haven’t sat at the altar earnestly in a very long time. I haven’t updated the journal since, like, March. And to a less patient Mother Bear my third crack at the DP would probably be an eye-roll. It’s also very, very easy to convince myself that some of the people in my life with whom I share my spiritual journey are little more than disappointed and irritated with me. I very well understand that there is waste.

So I dared to ask a follow up, directly to Dea Artio herself: What can I do to remedy that? How can I find the Wren’s lightning once more? To find that electric bond between my heart and the Gods?

The answer came as runes: Naudiz and Gebo. Continue to learn, engage in reciprocity.

I am literally the worst child. I whine and sigh and dramatize at how I’m doing poorly in school and I get in response “Just keep doing your work, you doofus.”

But it doesn’t matter does it? It never feels like my work is good enough. I’ll never be as good as him or her or be as smart as them or have the insight they do.

Yes, yes. I know I know. You’re not doing it wrong. You’re good the way you are. I’ve heard it. Why is it so damn hard to just… Accept and comprehend it?

The Morning Omens – 2/20/17

Who? Who? Who could it be?

Well, owl tell you.

Owl is a card I don’t think I’ve actually pulled before, yet She seems very familiar. It’s another one of those beautifully simple Oracle cards with a tawny owl perched in a thick tangle of woodland, the full moon glowing through a clearing in the branches. Trinkets hang nearby, one depicting the spiral of the well.

When I think Owl I think nocturnal, predatory, wise, and keen-eyed. Owl is very nearly from a different place entirely, able to see the world of darkness as if in light. While other creatures scurry and feel hesitantly The Owl perches above all, seeing and knowing with perfect clarity.

I read Owl as a message to be patient and see. See with the eyes and the spirit. Peer deep into the dark places and know what is there and decide carefully. Is it time to swoop now? Shall we wait and see what else comes? Owl knows and so shall we when Owl we embrace.

Life Is Happening In Real Time

I’m quickly finding myself overwhelmed by the rapid passage of time this year. I’ve fallen way behind in writing for the Dedicant Path coursework, I’ve yet to do anything in terms of writing regarding Imbolc or my powerful visitations with Brigantia or any of the majorly huge things that have happened in my spiritual life lately.

I feel like the cosmos keep putting beautiful, bespoke dishes in my arms, one after another, and as I stumble forward the mountain begins to teeter. All I need to do is step aside and put some of these bowls on the shelf… But just as arms reach to pull me aside, to sort things out, other arms push and push me forward.

Everything truly does come down to balance at the end. That pesky, pesky balance.

If it’s not raining too bad tomorrow I’ll bring my iPad to work and maybe catch up on some writing before my shift.

At least I got to briefly sit with Brigantia again today. I wanted to say hello and She pulled up some runes for me. Gebo and Dagaz. Tomorrow ought to be fun!

A Time To Rest

Goddess Artio sleeping with bear, oil, by Alexandra Nereïev

Following my exhausting illness and equally exhausting recovery (as well as work and DP catch-up) the blog will be taking a break for a bit. I need a little time to rest, recuperate, and explore this new and sudden bond with Brigantia that has been burning on the edge of my life. 

Hoping to be back soon with my forge rekindled. 

The Morning Omens – 2/6/17

Hello, Seal. Good to see you again. We’ve met before under similar circumstances. You present a dilemma of choice, hanging like this. I think this might be the fastest a message like this became clear, for moments after I consulted the deck I set out for work and found it raining quite hard.

“Well then,” I thought. “To brave the weather or spend thirty dollars for a ride in…”

As I’ve been focusing a great deal on cutting back the idea of spending $30 for a ride to work seemed distressing, so I carried on with my cane, lunch bag, and umbrella awkwardly in tow.

I got halfway down the street to discover my ID lanyard was missing. I sighed and trundled back home, rummaging through my clothes. Ten minutes later I found it and that’s when it was clear. My choice was pretty much made.

So I packed my iPad in too, since I wouldn’t have to stand out in the rain, and called a car. I’m en route as I’m typing this and while it was a choice largely made for me by circumstance it has afforded me an opportunity to catch up on writing, so that’s pretty cool.